Getting Married in the Church

GETTING MARRIED IN THE CHURCH

Christ the King Anglican Church  

937-224-8555  www.ckrec.org

A GUIDE FOR MEMBERS AND FRIENDS 

OF CHRIST THE KING ANGLICAN CHURCH

Your wedding day should be remembered forever as one of the most significant, joyous, and sacred occasions in your life. Holy Matrimony is a sacrament of love, promise, and grace as you pledge before God to live out the rest of your lives as one. Beautiful music, flowers, and happiness fill the entire celebration. As wonderful as a wedding day can be, it is only the beginning of a life lived out together in love and faith.

Christ the King Anglican Church and its pastor are committed to helping you enter into a truly Christian marriage and to establish a loving home. Because Christian marriage is a serious life long relationship, careful thought, planning, and preparation are required. The pastor of the church should be consulted before any plans are made, or a firm wedding date set.

Holy Matrimony is a sacrament of the Church and is administered by the Church (not the State) to couples where both parties have been baptized.  It is not merely a Service for couples that would like a “church wedding.” If you have not been actively practicing your faith, are not a member of the Church, or are not yet a baptized Christian, that need not prevent you from being married in the Church. This is a wonderful time to turn to Jesus Christ in faith, and to begin to faithfully live the Christian life as a member of Godʼs Church.

The pastor may not marry any couple or bless any previous civil marriage except in accordance with the canons (laws) of the Church. It is also within his discretion to decline to marry any couple.

If one or both parties have previously been married and a former spouse is still living, the case must be referred to the Bishop who will determine whether the couple can be married in the Church.
 

Those being married in the Church will be wed according to the rites and ceremonies of the Church (1662 or 1928 Book of Common Prayer). Neither the clergy nor the laity have authority to change the Churchʼs Marriage Service, or to substitute something else in its place.

The pastor generally requires six months of preparation before the wedding takes place. For good cause, and at the discretion of the pastor, the time of preparation can be shortened. In any case, the couple, or at least the Anglican partner, will be required to faithfully attend Sunday Services at Christ the King Anglican Church while preparing for marriage, and the couple will be required to meet regularly with the pastor for premarital counseling. Our pastor, Father Wayne McNamara, has been married to his wife Sandy for some thirty years, and has the experience as a Christian husband and father to help prepare you for married life. After the marriage ceremony is performed, the couple is expected to establish a Christian home, live faithful Christian lives, and to continue to conscientiously attend Sunday Worship (at least three times per month).
 

Soon after the engagement and prior to the wedding, the couple will be required to read, agree to, and sign the following declaration:

We, ____ and ____, desiring to receive the blessing of Holy Matrimony in the Church, do solemnly declare that we hold marriage to be a lifelong union of husband and wife as set forth in the Scriptures and the Book of Common Prayer. We believe marriage is for:

• the procreation (if it may be) of children and their spiritual and physical nurture,
• mutual fellowship, encouragement, and understanding
• and the safeguarding and benefit of society, 
   and we do engage ourselves, so far as in us lies, to make the utmost effort to establish this relationship and to seek Godʼs help thereto.

      We also declare our intention to faithfully honour God's command to live in holy chastity by abstaining from sexual relations until such time as we are gifted with the same upon the day of our wedding. We witness these things with our signatures below.

 

The Solemnization of Holy Matrimony (the Wedding Service) may take place in a church or some other suitable location approved by the pastor. Christ the King has a charge for the use their sanctuary. The bride and groom are free (with the guidance of the pastor) to suitably decorate the facility for the liturgy (Service). The Form of Solemnization of Matrimony in the Book of Common Prayer will be used for the Service. If the couple are communicants of the Church, the pastor will generally recommend that the Wedding include the Order for Holy Communion. The couple may select appropriate music for the Service (with the guidance of the pastor), and are responsible for providing musicians if desired. The pastor may be able to help with this if so requested by the couple. “It shall be his [the pastorʼs] duty to suppress all light and unseemly music, and all irreverence in the performance” (1940 Hymnal).
 

The bride, groom, and their attendants must be appropriately and modestly dressed. A veil for the Bride is much to be desired. Men should wear a coat and tie or tuxedo, while the women should wear dresses or skirts. The liturgical color for the Solemnization of Holy Matrimony is white.
 

Holy Matrimony as a sacrament of the Church is all that is needed to be truly married in the eyes of God. There must be at least two competent witnesses other than the Minister. A state wedding license for the couple is not required. The priest will not sign a state marriage license but will provide an appropriate certificate of marriage. If a couple wishes to have their union acknowledged by the state they will need to make necessary arrangements with an approved state representative.
 

There is no charge for the Service, but wedding stipends, or donations, are properly given to the presiding clergy and to others who assist at the liturgy. Stipends are not necessary for lectors or others who assist if they are chosen from among the wedding guests. Stipends should be commensurate with the amount of time various individuals have contributed to the event.

Having read this document, please contact the pastor and make an appointment to sit down and talk with him about your wedding plans. You will find him happy to work with you.

Father McNamara, can be reached by phone at (937) 604-6295 or (937) 224-8555 or by e-mail at: wayne.mcnamara@ckrec.org